Locusts: The 8th Plague

29Jan08

When the movie starts out with a quote from Revelations, you know there’s going to be some serious destruction.

Our hero is Dan Cortese, whose character’s name is Cole. Oh, yes, that’s right. Cole. He’s the inventor of a new organic pesticide, and also is skilled at flying helicopters and airplanes. His wife is our foxxy scientist doctor lady, a vet who works for the USDA.

We’ve got a secret research facility and some genetically engineered locusts. They were made to be carnivores, so they would eat the bugs from crops but leave the crops alone. They’re BIG, and they’re RED. I think the red makes them more sinister. They escape from the testing facility, of course, and leave a trail of destruction all over southern Idaho. Killing people, of course.

The researcher wants more time before the testing is done. The money guy wants to to go ahead, of course, on account of getting more money. Thus the escape and subsequent devastation.

Cole gives us a fantastic speech about effing around with nature. There is the requisite county fair attacked by the bugs, the military/chemical/organic folks conflict, and lots of grisly death by locust.

Even three glasses of wine could not convince me that Dan Cortese wasn’t a really, really bad actor. The dialogue was fairly cheesy, but the CGI shots of locusts taking down helicopters made up for it.

So, here’s a new review, finally. Please forgive me for being drunk while I write it.

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